Give Appreciated Gifts

Giving gifts is so much easier as a child.  Make something out of macaroni and mom and dad smile like you just painted the Mona Lisa.  A quick stop for a stuffed animal has your friend delighted.  

Giving gifts as adults to other adults is a little more complicated.  Especially if you want them to actually use and appreciate the gift.

If you want to be a gift-giving god, consider the following when choosing gifts for the people you care about.

Solve a Pain Point

What is a pain point?  A pain point is something that makes the day just a little bit more frustrating.  These are things the receiver struggles with every day but they haven’t had time (or money or the creativity) to fix just yet.

A recent pain point for me was that the closet under the stairs was so full and disorganied, I couldn’t find anything at all.  It made cooking, cleaning, taking care of my daughter, and doing any kind of project a challenge.  By the time it was fixed, I had decided anything that might need me to go in that closet was just not possible.  Seriously, it gave me panic attacks.

So what did I get for my birthday?  A fully organized and decluttered closet.  Everything has a place.  A lot of things are labeled.  I can find anything I might need in seconds.  It is glorious, and was the perfect gift!

But other pain points might be smaller.  Like a bag that is just the wrong size, or a computer that is getting too old, or maybe a hall closet in need of a shoe rack.

Whatever the pain point, notice it and fix it.  That is one of the best gifts a person can receive.

Elevate a Daily Task into a Ritual

There are things we do everyday that could be made just that much more special with a little tweak.  

Maybe the giftee drinks tea or coffee.  Could you do something to elevate that experience?  Higher quality tea leaves or a system so they can have freshly ground beans for their coffee every day could actually make them stop and appreciate their daily hot beverage.

Or maybe they do a lot of baking and don’t have silicone pan liners.  Perhaps they are an artist and you can find better quality pens or pencils for them to use. 

Giving something that changes a daily occurrence into something special and worth paying attention to is always a great idea.

Improve a Daily Use Item

This is a similar concept to elevating a daily task to a ritual, but it focuses instead on what I like to call “nothing items.”

A nothing item is something that is used often, but has no special meaning (ie-nothing) attached to it.  These are items that we expect to use until they break, but we got them at the dollar store (or the grocery store, or target, etc.) to solve an immediate need.  

Off the top of my head, some nothing items in my house include: the wooden spoons I cook with (I picked up a package in the grocery store), most of my mugs, some food crates I found in the dumpster that I now use as storage, the laundry basket at the foot of the stairs, an assortment of plastic foot stools and step stools strewn around the house, and the clear plastic bin organizers I use as bedside tables.  

Notice most of these things get used everyday.  I have no real urge to replace most of them, but I would in a heartbeat if I got something better quality with more meaning.  

Everyone has items like this.  Things they use every day that just bleed into the background.  Making those items stand out by giving a higher quality or hand made replacement is always a much appreciated gift.

Replace a Broken Object

Money is tight for everyone right now, so most of us are making everything we can last as long as we can.  Most of the people I know are in denial about things in their home that are far past their useful life.  Even I have things that I am staunchly denying are dead, even though I know they need replacing.

Pay attention to the things your giftee uses often and look at what condition those things are in.  Have their slippers seen better days?  Are their pants at the end of their useful life?  Do they keep fiddling with their bra straps because their bra is worn out?

Beyond clothing, are any of their electronics on their last legs?  Is their sketchbook or planner almost full?  Do they need a new water bottle or lunch box?

Whatever the broken object is, get them one of at least the same quality.  And if you are replacing something like clothing that needs to be tried on, get them a gift card to their favorite clothing store and dress it up in a fun way.

Give an Experience

Not every gift needs to be expensive or result in a physical item the person can keep forever.  In fact some of the best gifts aren’t tangible at all.

Take your friend out to lunch or dinner.  Spend an afternoon together.  Go go-karting.  Have a picnic.  Go see some museums or aquariums.  

Or give them the opportunity to do something they always wanted to do.  Give a gift card to the local pottery or art studio.  Get them some of those karate classes they’ve been wanting to try.  

You could give a subscription as well.  Buy a year of something they use often, like netflix or their favorite newspaper.  

We can’t take stuff with us, so give your friend a memory instead.

Give a Piece of Yourself

One year, in college, I wrote my friend a short story about two leaves on different branches that fell in love.  They spend their whole lives pining for each other and then only got to finally touch when they fell from the tree in the fall.  It was incredibly sad and sweet.  One of my roommates (an art major) illustrated it.  

It was our friends favorite gift.  She framed it.  It was awesome.

Giving a piece of yourself can be done a number of ways.  You could write the giftee a story or give them a piece of art that you made.  If the giftee is an avid reader, you could give them your favorite book and highlight your favorite passages in it.  If you sew or knit, you could give them clothing or a throw for the couch.  

Any craft you do can be turned into a gift for someone you care about.

Just make sure you don’t accidentally give them something they can’t use.  My MIL once made me these beautiful earrings.  They were gorgeous.  She took silver wire and spun it around an iridescent blue bead she had made herself to match my eyes.  Definitely my style, and they would have looked fantastic with most of the things I wear… only I don’t have pierced ears….

Give Time

Giving time is very different from giving experiences, even though they are often thought of as the same thing. 

Giving time means taking care of something so the giftee has time to do something they want to do instead of something they have to do.

When applying that concept to young parents, baby sitting always comes to mind.  Taking care of the kiddos for a few hours so the young couple can have a date or take a nap is always appreciated.  But it isn’t the only way to give time.

You could take a chore off their plate or make it easier.  For example you could pay for a cleaning service or buy them a roomba.  You could pay for someone to come mow their lawn (or you could do it yourself).  Take the car for an oil change.  

Basically, consider things they have to do often or things that take a lot of time and take that chore off their plate.  By doing this you allow the family time together without the stress of external obligations.  

Give Comfort

There is nothing quite like a soft fluffy blanket or sweater to make you feel comforted.  If you are at a loss on what to give a loved one, give them something they can wrap themselves up in and feel loved.

Give Consumables

Finally, give things the person can use up.  Chocolates, jams, favorite soaps, and art supplies all make great gifts.  Pick something you know the giftee will use and appreciate and give them something to enjoy.  

Wrapping it all up

To give the best gifts, you really have to know the giftee.  Gifts don’t have to be expensive or elaborate if they are thoughtful.  Sometimes the best gifts involve doing something for someone else.  

What were your favorite gifts?  Let me know in the comments below.  And don’t forget to like and share!